Session 4
For the first time I went to my treatment from work. My appt. was at 1 and I was fearful of a long wait. I had the car thanks to Cherie’s generosity and I got there very quickly up the Bayview extension. When I got there the sign said Syn1 was on time. I regretted not bringing my laptop and started doing potential blogs in handwriting to be transcribed later. I had to begin with Monday’s (session 2) because time is harder to find than I imagined. I wound up then and there deciding to shorten up my rant on the Olympics in the light of sober second thought. I had to acknowledge that even though I had chosen to go to a U of T playoff basketball game instead of watching Canada vs. Russia in hockey I had found myself checking scores on my Blackberry. Not only that but I was thrilled and relieved to hear the lopsided score for Canada.

I took another look at the digital sign and saw to my horror that Syn1 was now delayed an hour. How could that have happened so quickly? Visions of spending the afternoon at Sunny brook and falling behind at work flooded my mind. Ten minutes later they called me in to change. How could this be? The machine has two parts, the technician explained, and only the scanner is broken so we can still irradiate. Only people needing the scanner were being delayed. As I entered the room I began to worry and asked if they were confident they could still be precise. They assured me they could. A couple of days later I realized I had asked the wrong question. Later that night lying in bed as Cherie and I reviewed the day she asked if they could do the treatment without the scan why do they do the scan adding more radiation? It was a good question for which I had no answer. Cherie’s “good” shoulder is hurting a lot which is worrisome. Falling asleep in bed I had a new insight into why I fall asleep on the treatment table. More about that later.